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I like how much you were able to accomplish in a month with this vn. The transitions and snow effects were excellent, and the writing was well done with only a few minor errors. There were a couple places I feel were missed potential to develop plotwise, but again, that is likely due to the short time frame.
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Rounding down here, as it feels like a 3.5 to me at the moment and itch unfortunately doesn't have half stars. Love the sprites and I enjoyed the CG, but there was no music at all, and the narrative was kinda... not present, to me.
It felt like a lot of worldbuilding + pointing to a relationship, but I couldn't really get a sense for the intent of where the story was going. It felt more like a vignette.
While the game page notes this as being about the two lovers having their reconciliation celebrated (and then soured), I feel like with a more clear reflection of that in the text early on would help bring more coherency other than drowning in a sea of funky names.
And then we can get to all of the worldbuilding elements once we have the clear direction for where the narrative is taking us.
Just a little more structure for me to the narrative (and a little more focus on the emotions rather than the politics this early on--gotta bring the personal into the political to make it resonate more) and I think this will end up quite fun, because there is a care and consideration for the prose on the page.
And then some measure of audio too. The medium abhors a vacuum outside of expressing chosen moments.
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A good start to a larger story with great art. I look forward to seeing the continuation.
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Exciting premise with stunning visuals. Needs rework on some parts, but it's natural as the game is an unfinished prototype & first-time attempt.
More thorough review on the jam page comments.
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8.5/10 (game jam) | full scope: itch.io/post/11535824
Fun read from beginning to end. Compared to the previous work, the devs definitely took a big step forward, mainly in the visual department.
We need more cute big furry men, thank you very much for your service o7
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I really found this start to be very intriguing. I like how the bear character is introduced, I've met people like him in real life, ready to tell you everything even when you are quick on your way to something else. Very nostalgic. I enjoyed reading and the art!
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It's been cool to see Peppekz's work evolve. I liked this one a lot...he was able to pack a lot of character into a very simple VN assset-wise, particularly with the physical comedy. The ending was a little short and abrupt for me, but i had an enjoyful time following along with crotchety old europeans.
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a very important novel for a reason
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From the music, to the custom art (hehe bear tiddies), to the premise, "On a String" is a very well done short story. With so simple and fanfiction-tropey of a premise, there's a good deal of depth and realness here.
I would 100% read something else, either of these characters or a new property, from Bazcus
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It's been a long time since a became addicted to a visual novel, can't wait for updates. Great story.