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Excellent presentation and renpy wizardry as always.
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tl;dr: 5/5 worth reading
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Cute art. I like the method of differentiating thought and speech (and phone calls too). The little ending sequences were very cute in execution.
There's some oddities to the narrative, like the opening sharing Sebastien talking to himself things he already knows. I understand it's setting up the context for the reader, but the way it's delivered doesn't fit the context of what I would expect for the scene, and that sort of vibe continues a bit throughout.
While I'm not expecting an indepth knowledge of Herve's life, I expected more than just the general location for someone that's been invited over. There's a sort of disconnect that makes the relationship feel like in a different space than the mentor/best friend that the text tries to present.
That's kind of summed up in the rapid-fire transition into the ending. It works better if one choose to ignore the job prospects and feels less abrupt, but by ending at the same space for the other option (the one I chose first lol) the transition to the end of the visit was unexpected.
In that way, it feels like the two "routes" (as comingled as they are) are split in the intended "goal" of the work, which is to say, the implicit bias that the narrative suggests as the "correct" choice.
Some of these elements feel more apt from a viewpoint of a mentor, while some feel more apt from the best friend-cum-would be love interest, but given how much the narrative tries to support both of those being viable interpretations, it feels like the second "route" was more of an afterthought.
I think it would lend the piece strength to ask why that choice is needed, and if it's a bad one (that sort of mirrors itself after Herve's isolation), how does it arrive at that outcome if Herve exists in this liminal staate. And does the work need to be uncertain, or is there one outcome that the narrative is working towards and could be strengthened with a full focus on fulfilling that agenda?
I think this is a lovely attempt, and there's great ambience and cute visuals (and some nice GUI elements as well although the text briefly lingering was strange) but the narrative feels afraid to commit, and while that can reflect Sebastien, all the characterization of him we see feels as though like he's ready to commit and that choice is solely in Herve's hands, whereas we control Sebastien.
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The Prose felt very...you, which I know, obvious but yeah I generally enjoy the way you write.
The juxtaposition of text describing the room as feeling AI generated with the background being partially in sketch was something I found to be pretty awesome
Generally, Since November was a visual spectacle and a nice look into 4 Different Ways To Cope With The Apocalypse
Now that's a title that sounds like a Pizza movie ;P
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This was the first submission I played and I do say, I liked it quite a bit. Seeing the rivalry between these two grumpy old men was a bit funny and the conclusion is pretty straightforward and neat.
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Daring Choices shows attempts at tackling its topics, but whether it hits or not may depend on the reader alone. This project goes into more interesting directions, but it does so with a bluntness that may make it hard to get on its level. It doesn't really dive into potentially unique perspectives or crib from deeper works, instead, it ends up lingering in "alright-ness." It may be worth reading it to guage your own opnion of these themes and presentations, but don't be surprised if they don't fully connect.
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Fate Itself does a good job of setting up, but has a hard time delivering. The biggest example of this project has an interest in animal motifs (having 3 of them), but none of those end up with real pay off. Other issues include a minor plothole (as I see it), a somewhat rushed relationship and some flawed attempts at poeticism within the prose. Fate Itself does nail a couple of things: the pacing is excellent with no time wasted, which is what you want of a short story, and some pretty interesting UI (some of which, do fall on the aforementioned animal motifs issue). If you can dive into this project's world and characters, you may not see its flaws so clearly and have a good time.
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Art Building offers an unfortunately barebones experience on all fronts. Aside from the sprites, which are simple yet pleasant, this VN falls short in too many aspect to be worth a recommendation. The plot is very thin, the prose floats between basic and wonky and presentation is nothing special. There was time from its initial submission to the end of the Jam for some much needed polishing, but alas it did not come to pass. If you do want to experience it for yourself, take heed in the fact that it goes by too quickly to cause any strong negative feelings.
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I like how much you were able to accomplish in a month with this vn. The transitions and snow effects were excellent, and the writing was well done with only a few minor errors. There were a couple places I feel were missed potential to develop plotwise, but again, that is likely due to the short time frame.